I’m sure many of you have set goals about improving fitness and exercising more frequently. Perhaps your body is something that brings negative thoughts to mind and you want that to change. Dieting and diet related products are a forty billion dollar a year industry—this speaks loudly to the truth that you are not alone—many people want their bodies to change!

It is very easy to be critical of ourselves–especially when we’ve set goals that aren’t turning out the way we had hoped. Thoughts of “I’m failing at this too” or “I knew that I would mess up, what’s my problem” start to take over the adrenaline and motivation we were experiencing a couple of weeks ago.

I want to encourage you to re-focus. Not just by doing more, by checking off that daily workout on your to do list, but by focusing on what is going on inside of you. Allow yourself to tune in to the chatter inside of your mind. Take a moment to ask yourself if the way that you talk to yourself is helpful and encouraging—to you and to others. When we are self critical, we often become more critical of others.

Attempting to re-focus might look something like this…if a typical thought of yours in response to a recently set goal is “I knew I wouldn’t be able to do this, why am I even trying,” attempt to put the feeling that underlies that comment into a statement that is self affirming and motivating. This could include statements like “This is hard, and I am learning how to be determined.” Another example could be “The effort put into this change is helping me become a stronger person.” Getting away from self criticism can be one of the first steps at becoming successful with the goals we set for ourselves.

For more information on behavioral health issues, or to seek assistance, go to www.pinerest.org.

Do you consider yourself to be creative?

 There are a lot of myths that we often associate with creativity that keep us from being creative . For one, we believe that creativity is a rare find. The truth is, research shows that everyone has creative abilities. Despite what you’ve read or have been told, scientific research shows that creativity is not located in one particular area of the brain. So, claiming that we’re “just not right brained” doesn’t cut it anymore!

 So, if we all have creative potential and abilities, what gets in the way of nurturing our creativity? The risk of social disapproval is a major deterent to creativity. We’re scared of being made fun of, of looking silly, of messing up. Nurturing our own creativity involves taking a risk and being vulnerable and also being open to making mistakes.

 One of the main ways you can access your inner creative spirit is to let go of comparing yourself to others. The comparison game doesn’t really get us anywhere. In fact, it paralyzes most of us. There have been many times when I have thought about taking risks and have been stopped dead in my tracks when thinking of someone else who took a bigger or better form of the risk I am considering…the thoughts of “I’m not good enough” start to creep in and my creativity crawls right under the covers.

 Another way of growing creativity is to challenge yourself and to broaden your exposure to new areas of interest and knowledge.

When you think about yourself as a creative person, what thoughts arise for you? What gets in the way of you nurturing your creativity? How might growth in this area be helpful for you and for your roles and relationships in your life? What is the first step you might take towards growing in this way?

For additional information on this topic and similar issues mentioned in this blog entry, check out The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown. It’s a wonderful resource! 

For more information on behavioral health issues, or to seek assistance, go to http://www.pinerest.org

For parents who want to nurture the value of altruism in their children, this reality can be frustrating. We want our children to desire to give to others, we don’t want to have to make them do this, which can take the joy out of giving and seems to create one more thing for us to nag about, right?

There really isn’t any magical way to create or nurture this value, but what we do know is that children learn best through consistency, role modeling, and hands on experiences. In my last blog I talked about keeping our own social networking habits in check as we model to our children what a healthy relationship with technology looks like…and it is the same with service.

Three years ago, our street held our first block clean up. My middle child was 2 years old at the time. Our task during this cleanup was to travel up and down our street in Eastown and pick up litter along the way. Because we live close to businesses and are in a general walk through area, there is a lot of litter that accumulates. My daughter really got into this task, and ever since has been pretty passionate about picking up “glitter” whenever she sees it. Last week she even got a big thumbs up from a local business owner as she got off her bike, picked up a piece of trash, and found a nearby garbage can. I find this whole experience interesting because I have not talked to her about the importance of picking up litter, we just experienced it together. Because of that first block clean up, and block clean ups since, her little mind has been imprinted with the value of cleaning up what is not supposed to be there (now only if this transferred to her bedroom!).

This is a simple story, but one that I think illustrates the point well and might encourage you as a family to look for ways you can serve together. Maybe, as you look ahead to the summer and recognize more open spaces in your family schedule, you can integrate some regular way of giving or serving along with the vacations, sports events, and barbeques you are looking forward to. Are there organizations around you that could use an extra hand? A park that could use some beautifying? A family that could use a meal or other tangible service? The needs are all around us and ready to be engaged!

How have you nurtured the value of altruism, giving, and service in your family? Are there opportunities that are easy to find around you? What are other challenges that you find in this area of parenting?

For additional information on behavioral health issues, or to seek assistance, go to www.pinerest.org