Good Enough
Your colleague says: “You did an okay job with last week’s presentation.”
Your mother-in-law says: “Your house is clean enough but could use some attention to detail.”
Your partner says: “The meal you made tonight? It was alright.”
You tell yourself: “Parenting—hmmm…why can’t I get it together (seems like everyone else can)?”
Your supervisor says: “Job performance? Yep, you are meeting expectations.”
What do these statements bring out in you? Pride and satisfaction? Or, are you like me and recognize that there are some feelings of disappointment and guilt that, if you heard any of these statements, would be there if you were really being honest with yourself? I think it is safe to say, that striving for mediocrity is not on many people’s list of lifetime goals.
The truth is that there is such a drive in today’s culture to ‘have it all and have it all at once.’ We walk around believing and telling ourselves that we are “less than” if we don’t measure up to this impossible standard—to have everything in order, perfectly, all the time. Some personality styles adhere to this more than others, but I think that it is pretty clear that we are all affected in some way or another by unrealistic expectations…that others have of us or that we have of ourselves.
I challenge you to think about the yardstick that you use for measuring how you are doing in each of your roles. What does it mean to truly be the best version of yourself…as a parent, employee, spouse, friend? Who or what defines this for you? Is there anything that would be helpful to just let go? If so, what would be your first step?
I think that in many instances, “good enough” is more than just okay. “Good enough” can actually be sustainable and can lay the groundwork for satisfaction, fulfillment, and joy.
For more information on behavioral health issues, or to seek assistance, go to www.pinerest.org.
I am clinical social worker with Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Services. I work with individuals, couples and families at the Caledonia Clinic and I also see students at Davenport University. I graduated from Calvin College, where I now teach as an adjunct instructor, and completed my graduate work at Michigan State University (go Spartans!). As a therapist, I work with a wide range of people and issues, which I find both energizing and challenging. Being a therapist is one of my passions, but not my only. On the home front, I have been married for ten years to an amazing man and have three young energetic children. To seek balance and have some fun, I also enjoy running, having coffee with friends, reading, frequenting local restaurants, and living in my Eastown neighborhood. My blog entries will reflect my various roles, experiences, and interests.