A few blog entries back, I mentioned that striving for balance includes giving attention to how various aspects of our lives—work, family, friends/community, and self–fit together in such a way that is stable, sustainable, and meaningful.

I want to pass along an exercise that I’ve used in my own life as well as in my work with clients that can be helpful in this process of striving for balance. It’s called The Time Pie (credit to Alice Domar PhD), and is a way for you to identify how you can care for yourself in order to give more fully to your responsibilities.

Giving to your work, to your family, friends, and community from a full self instead of an exhausted and depleted self helps lay the groundwork for you to be able to give well, without bitterness or resentment, but instead with an open heart and greater joy.


1.    First, draw a circle on a piece of paper and create a pie chart of your typical 24 hour day. Include sleep, work and other activities and the approximate amount of daily time you spend on these activities each day. (give yourself some grace here—don’t beat yourself up for the hour a day you spend on facebook!). Write activities in each slice until your whole pie (24 hour day) consists of large and small slivers of time. Include phone calls, errands, eating, etc.
2.    On another piece of paper, write down the numbers 1-20 in a column. As quickly as possible  (without overthinking), list 20 things that bring you joy or create a sense of peace for you. Anything goes here—some examples include surfing the internet,  daydreaming, reading the newspaper, having lunch with a friend, or even watching old movies.
3.    Then, look at your list and your time pie side by side. Is there any room in your current time pie for any of the activities you listed? Some activities can be part of a typical day while others are more occasional. What does this exercise reveal about how you are caring for yourself? Are there any barriers when you  try to include a few slices of time for at least some of your listed activities? Try to be realistic and creative in how you could integrate some activities that give you joy into your typical day. For me this meant cutting out some non satisfying TV time. For a client, it’s resulted in asking for more help from family to clean up supper so she could have time afterwards to read her favorite magazine.

This exercise is a tool that can open up some new possibilities for you to replenish your energy and be more fully able to give to your relationships and responsibilities. I’d love to hear what this exercise reveals about balance and time for you!

For additional information on behavioral health issues, or to seek assistance, go to www.pinerest.org